As a story with a 'magic trick' reveal your script feels a little flat - This due to the linear nature of your narrative and the way events play out sequentially.
Please see the animation below - This is similar 're-interpretation' premise that uses perspective to fool the audience. Your animation needs a similar icon/ mechanism (CCTV Camera in this case) to trick your audience.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6zpwscHUJA
For example, to go back to you internet cafe idea -
Opening:
Foreground - A young guy (hacker/ cultural 'bad youth' stereotype) is sitting in an internet cafe.
Background - A businessman works on a computer
Main:
The Hack begins - As the 'Hack' ensues we cut between the computer screen / keyboard and 'The Hacker' drinking from a unique Coffee Mug (Obscured Face). We don't see the same information from distance close up hands, coffee mug, keyboard, and screen only.
Close:
We return to the same view as the opening. We see the young guy stand up and walk away leaving the business man to pick up the 'Hacker's Mug'. We close with a shot of the mug and the final tap of the 'Enter key'.
Notes: The business man should be a 'Banker' as a way to reference the banking/ financial crisis. You may also wish to focus on a particular company/bank such as Enron again to make reference to 'dubious practices'
Additional - Instead of a 'Hack' this could be a 'Fire Sale' (See Die Hard 4 Plot) which is intended to bring down all services (electricity, water, gas etc). The end of the animation could be lights outside going out one by one or cars screeching etc.
Hi Guys
ReplyDeleteAs a story with a 'magic trick' reveal your script feels a little flat - This due to the linear nature of your narrative and the way events play out sequentially.
Please see the animation below - This is similar 're-interpretation' premise that uses perspective to fool the audience. Your animation needs a similar icon/ mechanism (CCTV Camera in this case) to trick your audience.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6zpwscHUJA
For example, to go back to you internet cafe idea -
Opening:
Foreground - A young guy (hacker/ cultural 'bad youth' stereotype) is sitting in an internet cafe.
Background - A businessman works on a computer
Main:
The Hack begins - As the 'Hack' ensues we cut between the computer screen / keyboard and 'The Hacker' drinking from a unique Coffee Mug (Obscured Face). We don't see the same information from distance close up hands, coffee mug, keyboard, and screen only.
Close:
We return to the same view as the opening. We see the young guy stand up and walk away leaving the business man to pick up the 'Hacker's Mug'. We close with a shot of the mug and the final tap of the 'Enter key'.
Notes: The business man should be a 'Banker' as a way to reference the banking/ financial crisis. You may also wish to focus on a particular company/bank such as Enron again to make reference to 'dubious practices'
Additional - Instead of a 'Hack' this could be a 'Fire Sale' (See Die Hard 4 Plot) which is intended to bring down all services (electricity, water, gas etc). The end of the animation could be lights outside going out one by one or cars screeching etc.
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